A eulogy is often seen as a way to remember the most notable aspects of the deceased. Therefore, given its significance, the person asked to deliver one will undoubtedly be pressured to get it right.
If you have been requested to deliver one, you will certainly be asking yourself plenty of questions, such as how long your speech should be or if a joke is inappropriate. Unless you are a public speaker, it is natural to feel nervous about this important moment. As such, let us share four crucial tips you should note before you prepare to write and deliver your eulogy.
1. Tailor your message to suit the decedent’s background
Before you begin writing your eulogy, consider the deceased’s background and which aspects of him or her stood out to you. A eulogy feels more authentic when it speaks to a core aspect of the decedent. Try to sum up what makes this person so unique. For example, if the deceased values family, give some examples of the things they have done to express their love.
2. Consider the tone of your eulogy
It is essential for you to discuss how the death has affected you. However, try to keep the subject matter relatively light and positive. While a funeral is understandably sombre, the aim of the eulogy is to remind everyone why they love the decedent so much in the first place.
You may consider inserting a joke or two, depending on the circumstances. If the deceased was a person that loves jokes or was a comedian, sharing your favourite joke may feel appropriate. However, it is advisable to not go overboard with the humour. What is important is that you are honest and respectful of the deceased and everyone attending the funeral.
3. Mind the clock
The general rule of thumb for a eulogy is between 5 to 10 minutes. If you are not the only speaker, you should consider trimming it down to about 3 minutes. You should also consider when you are scheduled to speak so you do not overrun the clock and affect the funeral schedule. There are strict timings to adhere to when conducting the ritual for a Taoist funeral or Buddhist funeral service. Therefore, it is imperative that your eulogy is of an appropriate length, so you do not delay the ceremony.
4. Ask for help
Even though you were tasked to write and deliver the eulogy, it is advisable to seek the help of those close to the deceased. Do not hesitate to brainstorm ideas with them and ask them if they want to share any interesting stories. In addition, allow them to review your drafts so you can polish the writing before you deliver the eulogy.
We hope our tips have provided you with some guidance on writing and delivering a eulogy that will commemorate the deceased and help the mourners reminisce the best part of the decedent’s life.
If you require any assistance in arranging a funeral, you should consider engaging the services of a funeral company. At 1Stop Buddhist Funeral Services, our team understands that everyone has their unique view on how they want their loved one’s funeral to be carried out. As such, we listen attentively to your every requirement and ensure they are carried out accordingly.